


Losing Everything I've Ever Owned

by cookiecastiel



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Child Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Romantic Soulmates, Soulmates, harry potter and draco malfoy are soulmates, more tags will be added as the story continues, ratings will go up, this is just the first chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-07-18 06:53:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16113137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cookiecastiel/pseuds/cookiecastiel
Summary: Harry Potter is sure he doesn't have a soulmate. Draco Malfoy, on the other hand, is completely 100% sure of having a soulmate.





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is my first ever chaptered work, I'm really nervous to put it up because I only have this first chapter done and I want this to be continued. I'm going to try really hard to update every other week or something but updates will be sporadic. I am in school right now and I'm taking two AP courses so we'll see how busy I get but I do want to try my best.  
> Anyways, I hope you like it this is just the first chapter, a little introductory, we'll get into it next chapter!

Harry Potter was sure he didn’t have a soulmate.  
He is 18 and in his ‘8th’ year of Hogwarts, and yet he still hasn’t found his soulmate. Most people find their soulmate around 15 but not him, not Harry Potter. He isn’t even surprised really, the universe probably didn’t think he’d survive past the battle so why bother wasting someone on him? He should’ve died with Voldemort but somehow he’s still alive and he and the universe are both confused.  
He knows he doesn’t have a soulmate because he has never once gotten a mark on his body he can explain away. See, when someone is born they will get marks on their body from their soulmate. It can be anything really, bruises scars, wounds of any sort. The difference is, the person who gets these marks from their soulmate can’t feel them, they can only see it, and after a while it’ll fade away. Bruises will fade in a half hour or so, scars will obviously start as the wounds which caused them and they’ll stay for a day maybe two, scratches fade very quickly in just a minute or two, and so on and so forth.  
So the fact that Harry has never gotten one of these marks is quite concerning to him. And the only conclusion he can seem to draw is, he has no soulmate, no one will ever love him.  
He just wishes that after all he’s been through, after all the people he’s lost, he could have someone to love him no matter what. That he could go up to the commons after classes and have someone there already, waiting for him, wanting him. But no the universe said fuck it when he was created, said well he’ll die quickly just let him be alone, and when he didn’t die, the universe said whelp, nothing we can do now, and left him alone.  
And honestly, maybe he would die soon. Maybe he would die by his own volition, because currently he’s sitting at the dining table with Ron and Hermione sitting close together beside him, Neville and Luna aren’t too far away sharing laughs, and Seamus and Dean are right there in front of him snogging the lips off eachother. And then there is Harry sitting their in the middle of all this love and not being on the receiving end of any of it. And maybe you’re thinking, wow that’s really selfish of you Harry why can’t you be happy for your friends, and he’d tell you, well I was happy three months ago when it was all new and exciting but now every time I turn a corner I’m met with the slick sounds of lips smacking passionately while I haven’t kissed someone since Cho in 5th year! And I don’t even like girls!  
Then he would flush bright red and stammer out an apology for getting so angry before looking to the floor and scurrying away quickly. Yes, it was sometimes hard to remember he defeated Voldemort when he acts so shyly.  
But really, the problem still stands, Harry wants someone to love, but everyone has already been destined someone since the day they were born. So really it’s kind of impossible, which brings Harry to the ultimate conclusion of death. He’s pretty sure he wouldn’t actually commit suicide but on his darkest nights he has to think, if the reason I was able to defeat Voldemort was love then why should I stay alive when love will never be an option for me? But then he’ll remind himself he has familial and platonic love, he’ll just never get to experience romantic or sexual love. Which hurts, badly.  
But there’s nothing he can really do about it. 

 

Draco Malfoy, on the other hand, is completely 100% sure of having a soulmate. The reason for this is because of the sheer amount of marks he’s gotten on his body since the day he was born. When he was younger he used to get big blooming bruises on various parts of his body, they didn’t hurt of course and they vanished within an hour but, everytime he got them he was filled with a confusing mix of love, and fear. Love because he knew they came from his soulmate and he was of course very excited to see any signs of life from them. The fear however came from the frequency with which he got these marks. They came almost daily, sometimes more than daily. And, sure, Draco was a very graceful child who didn’t get bruises much himself so there is always the argument he just doesn’t understand rowdy children who get hurt daily from playing, but he’s also pretty sure that even rowdy children don’t get such bruises so frequently.  
When he started Hogwarts he noticed that the marks would almost stop coming completely during the school year. He would get a scratch or two every now and then but usually they were so minor he barely caught glimpse of them before vanishing. There was probably many more that he just never noticed at all. But when summer came the marks came with it without fail every year. He wasn’t sure what this pattern meant at first, but as he got older he started to understand. It was obvious his soulmate went to a boarding school, and he had an abusive homelife, that was the most logical conclusion, even if it hurt him to draw it. Really, he wanted to just find his soulmate as fast as possible and save them from whatever hell they were living in, but with Voldemort and everything in the past few years it was quite hard to focus on much of anything other than surviving.  
When 7th year rolled around and the marks on his body came frequently once again, he was quite confused. It was the middle of the school year and the marks had yet to let up. He could only guess that the reason was because somehow his soulmate was being held at home rather than going to school. His concern for his soulmate skyrocketed that year but he couldn’t solely focus on that because the next thing he knew he was at meetings for the death eaters and crying every night not knowing what to do, the fear of him or his mum dying choking him up.  
When the battle ended and Voldemort was defeated once and for all everything calmed down immensely. Not only for him but also for his soulmate it would seem. He started to wonder then if they went to Hogwarts, seeing as how the timing of the marks was always right when the school year ended and they stopped right when the school year started. This idea had always been in his brain but the fact that the marks also stopped with the battle he felt as though his suspicions were confirmed. It was obvious, his soulmate had been a part of the war, there was no way around it.  
He knows they go to Hogwarts, and he knows they were a part of the war. The only question left to ask was, who exactly is it?


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, finally, the next chapter is up.

Chapter 1

“Harry, get up.”  
“Harry, it’s breakfast.”  
“Harry, I swear to god I’ll curse you if you don’t get up right now.”  
“Harry, I’m not kidding.”  
“Aguamenti,” Ron cast the spell right on top of Harry’s head forcing him to bolt upright and shake his head like a dog.  
“Ron, what the hell was that for?” Harry asked indignantly.  
Ron didn’t answer him, too busy laughing his arse off to care that Harry was already shivering. But alas Harry couldn’t help but crack a small smile, amused by the almost purple color Ron’s face had taken.  
Ever since the war had ended harry seemed to sleep in every day. Of course his sleeping was limited at the Dursley's when he was made to make breakfast every morning. But when they went on the hunt for the horcruxes he never seemed to be able to get back those hours of sleep he had to give up. It honestly felt like he hadn’t slept in years.  
Harry cast a drying and warming charm on himself before peeling back the bed sheets and standing, wearing his comfortable pajamas. He walked to the bathroom where he looked intensely at himself in the mirror. His hair looked terrible, his cheeks sunken in and gaunt, his green eyes were dull and bloodshot, and he’s pretty sure he hasn’t taken an actual shower in a few weeks opting for shotty cleaning charms.  
Not having the energy or the willpower for an actual shower he casts more cleaning charms and even casts a freshening up charm so his skin didn’t look so sickly in the hopes of not worrying his friends any more than he already does. Alas, even with the various charms, he still looks like shit.  
When he exits the bathroom Ron is there by the bedpost waiting for him. Together they walk down stairs where they meet Hermione, all three of them head down to the great hall together.  
Walking to their breakfast table he catches sight of Draco Malfoy, the same Draco Malfoy who hadn’t once started something with him all year so far. He didn’t mind that, not really but he couldn’t help but miss him and his insults in a weirdly disgusting way. Honestly Hogwarts didn’t feel how it should without interaction with Draco, he would go for anything at this point; an insult; a punch; a kiss. But ew no not a kiss, anything but a kiss, he did not want to kiss Malfoy for Merlin’s sake. Anything but a kiss. Gross.  
` The great hall also looks way different than it had the year before the war. Before, only the upperclassman, the 6th and 7th years, would be the only ones who sat with other house tables, and that was because of their soulmates. But, never would anyone from Slytherin sit in another house, and never would anyone go sit at the Slytherin table. After the war though it seems people have let go of these prejudices and now a lot of the tables have Slytherins in them and people from other houses sit with the Slytherins.  
He couldn’t help but notice that Draco didn’t have a soulmate either. That he sat a few feet from all the couples, legs crossed and daintily eating whatever meal it was. He also couldn’t help but notice that he himself did the exact same thing.  
At times like these he really wishes he could insult Malfoy about it, get a rise out of him, but no, he has to remember he’d basically be making fun of himself.  
“C’mon Harry, you’re staring again,” Hermione said knowingly, looking from him to Draco. Ron on the other hand stood blissfully unaware staring at the food on the tables and breathing in the smell of breakfast.  
“Yeah, c’mon Harry hurry up I’m Starving,” Ron whines tugging on the hand he’s got in Hermione’s.  
“Ron, you’re always starving,” Harry laughs, but his eyes still drift over to Malfoy’s, their eyes meet like two curses, green and silver battling for what, they don’t know. Then Draco seems to catch himself and he turns back to the other Slytherins, eating his breakfast. 

 

When Draco Malfoy got up that morning he felt very refreshed. He was actually really healing from the wounds of war and he felt quite good.  
Getting up he got in the shower and used all his luxurious products from France he had gotten over the summer. He got out and used a quick drying charm. He doesn’t use the gel products his father would insist upon, instead he let his hair fall in front of his face in loose bangs.  
Leaving the bathroom he looks around the dorm he’s currently living in, he asked for a single, and because he’s an eighth year they allowed it. Everything looks like the regular dormitories except bigger, a big king size bed, a big bedside table, a big dresser, and a big desk. All for him, one man.  
Heading down the stairs he can hear the chatter of lower class men, as they greet each other with ‘good mornings’ and head out the door.  
He walks by himself, eavesdropping and observing the various paintings, saying hello to a few he’s known since 1st year.  
When he reaches the great hall he sighs to himself seeings all the couples together even at his own table, before sitting down at the end as far away as he can get and starting to pile food on his plate.  
No matter how hard he’s tried to break all of the pureblood/Malfoy traditions he’s had branded into his brain since he was a child, there’s still a few he can’t seem to get rid of. One of those being proper eating etiquette. He can’t really care too much about that one, it is rather nice being able to not look like an animal, or rather Ronald Weasley while trying to enjoy every meal.  
Just as he’s starting to eat his usual croissant with butter and tea, none other than the golden trio walks in. In past years he definitely would’ve scoffed and nudged Blaise or Pansy but now Blaise and Pansy aren’t here, and really he only would scoff at Weasley.  
He can feel Potter’s gaze searing across his skin, he knows Potter has been wanting to mess with him, to antagonize him in some way and get a reaction of any sort. But honestly Draco doesn’t want to respond, to encourage him in any way. And, plus, this whole ‘enemies’ bullshit is frankly immature, and he refuses to be any part in it.  
After awhile he begins to wonder why he can still feel Potter’s gaze upon him, after a good two minutes of just sitting there on fire from its intensity. Finally he looks up, right into two pools of bright green. They stare back at him never ceasing, he stares back challengingly and, of course, Potter never backs down from a challenge. After a bit of this in the air battling he remembers that this is the Harry Potter and he is not going to partake in any childish behavior as he has done in past years.  
He watches as him and his two friends walk to the Gryffindor table where he sits on the end. Hermione and Ron sit closely together, heads an inch apart as Harry sits there getting his breakfast ready. He watched as he grabbed one of almost everything from the table, listening to Ron talk about something with his mouth full.  
But as Draco continued to watch the scene he noticed that Harry never one ate anything. He drank a lot of tea, but for the most part his food was left untouched. Ron would lean over and steal a sausage or piece of fruit, and when Harry caught him they would laugh and Ron would go on eating what he stole. The most peculiar part of it all though was, Harry didn’t even seem to notice. He didn’t look as though he was deliberately not eating his food, it was as though he just forgot it was even there.  
Finally Draco watched as Harry picked up his fork and speared a piece of fruit on the end of it, he brought it to his mouth nodding at whatever it was Hermione was saying. Just before his lips were to meet the fruit, he put his fork down and started to dramatically respond to whatever they were talking about. Draco sighed in frustration, he wanted to go over there and force Potter to eat, but at the same time, why did he care so much? Honestly, who cares about Potter’s unhealthy eating habits, and inability to actually take care of himself. He’s 18 for Salazar’s sake, he doesn’t need anyone monitoring what he’s doing. And if he died from starvation, Draco wouldn’t even care. In fact, it serves him right, he defeats the dark lord only to die from his own actions, go ahead Potter, die, see if I care.  
Draco would in fact care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I'm so bad at updating. I've been working on this since the prologue and it took me so long to write 1500 words god. I'm really trying to get these chapters up. This is my first chaptered work, so hopefully as we continue I'll get better.  
> Honestly, the only time I picked up my computer and started writing is when I read your comments, they really motivate me and want to write the next chapter so please leave comments and kudos!   
> Just expect slow updates, especially because I'm taking 2 AP classes, and like 3 clubs.  
> Thank you so much for reading, I hope this was a good chapter! I'm still just establishing setting and characters and all that, we'll get into the plot soon!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, and look out for the next chapter I'm thinking I'll probably update in a week or so, my motivation is really sporadic.


End file.
